Tuesday, May 5, 2009
5:10 PM
Finally, my tests are over. GOSH I'M FAILING! IT'S THE FIRST TIME I'M REALLY FAILING AND IT MAKES ME FEEL SO BAD AND HORRIBLE INSIDE! BTW have I told you I found out I'm a perfectionist??
Well, stereotypically, I thought that being a perfectionist means you want everything perfect. Which is not me, and true. BUT there's another meaning to perfectionism, which is you want to be better and keep going better until you can't, and when that happens you just have to be better (: If you really can't and fail, you'll get horribly emo and call yourself incompetent and the sort.
And I failed!!! Why do I have to fail?!! I felt so bad for failing la T_T good thing is, no one actually reads my blog now so I can talk crap all the way! Wooohoo, I hate those bozos that think this is their property and they shit about things that are unfair. Hello, my prime policy is "fairness is everything!" If things are unfair, I would make it just. I'm not the type of person who goes to a blog, yell there as if it's mine for no reason like a brainless, siao person.
So anw, I failed. SADD!!! What am I doing?! Am I so idiotic? HAH?!!! I'm supposed to be quite brainy. My IQ is 120 or somewhere there!! So WHY?!!! Why am I so stupid to fail?!!! Am I that lazy and incompetent?!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
My Maths : 10/40. What the fucking shit is this?! 10/40, for E MATHS!!! bloody toots, I should just stop trying if I keep getting this sort of marks.
My Malay (letter writing) : 8/20. EEHHH!!! I'm supposed to be gd in malay, it's my best subject. And I got 8!!! 8!!!!! What's wrong with me?!!
My POA: 3.5/20 OH MY GOSH DID MY BRAIN JUST FELL OUT OF ME OR SMTH! STUPID, IDIOTIC, CRUDE.
My chem: 10/30 my chem is always like this, but why!?!! I deprove by the way =/ That WL got 19!!! Am I so stupid to keep losing to him!?!!
And yes, my O lvls are coming this year. Oh my goals? Throw them in the trash. I'm never going to be "top" or going to JC, or even becoming different. I'm just going to be the same with my parents and uncles and aunties and cousins. Study, work. No one knows you. You're nobody and if you die, it won't make a difference to the world. I'm not going to go to a gd university overseas and I'm not going to get a double degree in two prestigious courses because I failed! I failed!
and I'm not working hard. look at me, brooding over things that are useless. I'm bound to never succeed. My doujins are useless. No one wants to read them. all my skills are equal to nothing~! NOTHING!!! Should've known from the start!!
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ok next topic! Aqua timez yeah?? aww they're awesome!!! Their songs are AMAZING! Here are some of their songs...
Ketsui no Asa Ni
Sen no Yoru wo Koete
ALONES
Niji
Velonica
STAY GOLD
Some of their ULTIMATELY POPULAR SONGS! And they only debuted in 2005 ok???
